How My Spirituality Helps Me Cope With Life’s Greatest Challenges
Last year my husband was diagnosed with a chronic illness that currently has no cure. Watching my partner struggle with his physical health, and the resulting emotional turmoil, has been such a challenge, and yet an unexpected blessing.
It’s so hard to see the ones we love suffering.
Seeing his illness change his body has inadvertently changed how I see him. The happy, cheerful, healthy person I used to know isn’t there anymore, and in his place is someone who fights every day to find some happiness while dealing with seemingly insurmountable struggles.
Some of my most valuable lessons I’ve learned in this lifetime thus far have come from being married to someone with a chronic illness.
It can be too easy to get swept up in who we are today.
We look at our bodies, our careers, our struggles, and falsely believe that this the total of who we are.
Let me tell you that who you are in this moment is not a full reflection of who you are as a soul.
You are so much grander than this life.
Your soul is on this beautiful eternal journey of self-discovery; you existed before you were born and will continue to exist after you die.
Life can drag us down, especially when we are going through a particularly difficult and challenging period.
My beautiful partner struggles with manifesting his own joy and happiness because he is constantly reminded that his life is not what he hoped or wanted. It’s hard to be happy while you are sick, and when you are sick every day, it becomes even more challenging to overcome the inertia of suffering and feeling sorry for yourself.
Please don’t get the wrong idea. My husband is an inspirational soul. Despite his daily struggles, he focuses on being present with his family and showing up in any way he can. The strength he shows is truly magnificent.
I often catch him singing to himself while he prepares a delicious vegan meal for his family, peace radiating out of him.
He knows as well as I do that happiness comes from within, and often enough he is able to create simple moments of happiness for himself.
I will admit that at times I also struggle to see past his illness. Cultivating acceptance for our lives is an ongoing struggle. Some days it’s easier to give in and go with the unexpected direction of our life together. Other days I’m stuck in the feelings of unfairness and resentment at the world.
While I firmly believe we planned this life for ourselves, including my husband’s illness, at times I think, “Why us? Why can’t we catch a break?”
Obviously that type of thinking isn’t helpful, and I try to steer my mind away from dwelling on thoughts like those.
Prayer always helps me overcome those moments.
So back to the beautiful lesson my husband’s illness has taught me. Too often we get swept up in the moment, getting lost in the mundane daily issues and challenges, forgetting the bigger picture.
Then something will happen that forces me to see past what’s right in front of my face. In these moments I end up seeing my husband with fresh eyes. I see him and I remember that he is so much more than his illness.
He, like all of us, is a beautiful soul incarnating in this body. He is so much more than his illness, his career, his cooking, his talents, his challenges, everything.
We are so much more than the sum of this lifetime.
Some days I look at my husband and I’m reminded of the soul within. That soul is who I love, whom I continue to reincarnate with and dedicate my life to.
In these moments I try to remind him of who he truly is. That his illness doesn’t define him because he is so much more than whatever is happening today. Thankfully my spiritual beliefs have made it much easier to see the soul within.
Please don’t lose sight of who you are.
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This post is dedicated to my husband Stuart: may you continue to see the light in yourself.